I believe that emotional problems derive from our past experiences as well as our current perceptions and behaviors. Our past experiences inform our beliefs and perceptions about ourselves and the world, and we act in ways that are consistent with these views. To illustrate what I mean, let’s consider how anxiety may develop. If you were recently robbed in a parking lot, you may now consider all parking lots to be dangerous and may feel anxious whenever you have to park your car. Prior to being robbed you had no fear of parking lots; now, based on your traumatic experience, your brain signals “danger” whenever you see one. In short, your perceptions have been shaped by your traumatic experience, resulting in anxiety and your avoidance of parking lots. This does not mean you are “crazy,” it simply means that you have developed a fear response (anxiety) based on your unfortunate experience. Therapy can help you restore how you view the world so that you feel less scared and anxious and can return to your everyday functioning.
It is not just our everyday experiences that cause us distress, however. Often it is childhood events that result in relationship problems and psychological difficulties. It is these childhood experiences that inform our perceptions about ourselves and determine how we relate to others. If you were mistreated in childhood, for example, you might have a really hard time trusting others or might avoid relationships altogether. You are unlikely to have the trusting, loving relationships you so desperately need. The task of therapy is to transform your old beliefs and way of relating to others so that you view the world differently and feel more comfortable with yourself and others.